Is art here to show us a better version of ourselves? Is art meant to inspire, or, is it plainly a reflection of what is already beneath our surfaces? There’s an adage that says “art reflects life reflects art.” Law & Order has built a culture that is based off of things that happen in real society. Sure they change the names, but, the reality of the situation is still the same. Children are mistreated, people are murdered, tortured, and just plain sick. Art reflects life.
For every Law & Order, COD: MW2 and reality show based on some far-out cele-bratty, we see people who go out and take crime, passion or the pursuit of their happiness to the next level. Their senses become intoxicated and numb to normal. They push the limit to what’s shocking to people. Life reflects art.
But occasionally, you find a gem of art, which makes you pause and think about the possibilities for your own world. It challenges your normal. It causes you to ask yourself, in a healthy way, why can’t I actually be more than I ever thought I could be? (In a responsible way.) It feels funny enough admitting this, but, that’s what the Cosby show is, for me.
It’s no secret that my parents divorced when I was in high school, but not without much drama. My parents aren’t total opposites, they don’t hate each other and clearly at one time were in love. They made a commitment before God to each other, and, after walking together for some time, their paths began to drift in opposite directions. Sometimes, we realize that we’re only human. That no matter how we pray, try or cry, things just aren’t going to move in the direction of your liking. Or perhaps it wasn’t meant to be that way ever. And then yoyu have a situation that was supposed to be for a second lasting a season and us trying to make it into the reason behind something. It’s hard to headline a cameo actor. Just doesn’t work.
And no, I’m not saying that my parents weren’t supposed to work, but walk with me and I think the point will become clearer.
There were life lessons that children of divorce experience, which act as a coarse file to the edges of our hearts. And only through thorough searching and a steel-will to face OURSELVES do we find the truths in the tears our hearts only cried on the inside. Everyone thinks their parents are invincible. Until that moment you realize that they’re not. And I suppose that in two-parent homes that work, and are full of love (reference the type of normal home the Cosby’s would have had) that there’s always a bit of super-hero left in your parents. You catch the way he looks at his bride; the way she connects with her man…moments like these show a balance of energy that, if you glance too fast, you’ll miss.
And out the door go the building blocks of great relationships.
A marriage, at a very simple and almost boring level, is a balance of energy within a space. Energies that are whole and independent. But in the space that they occupy, commit their lives to a tight-wire, teeter-totter act. Always performing slight adjustments to restore the normal; always aware of the other energy in the space, always searching for the balance.
And that example is the basis for excellent relationships. A good relationship (business partner, friend, family member, spouse) is at a simple level, a balance of energy between two people. But if you never see a great balancing-tight wire routine, you will never understand that it is possible.
It would be like attempting to explain the internet to the generation who never experienced in home electricity. While they would crudely be able to follow what you’re saying, their minds would be unable to create a reality that reflected the picture that you would paint, no matter how great the oratory.
Is it hard? Of course. Concessions are made for the good of the balance, not just the good of the individual. I look at my life, being a part of several high-wire acts. And after every fall, I grab my stick and begin the painful climb back up. Because what the Cosby show allowed me to see, was a tomorrow that would erase all of my yesterdays.
Boldly, or maybe naively, I have invited several people to believe in what I see. And maybe I don’t live in reality on this one; because some of them have been less than excited to put themselves out there and join me on the teeter-totter. I am optimistic. But if we don’t believe that the future can be better, why do we work so hard at any of it??